Last night, I attended a local political meeting in my city, and I couldn’t help but notice that the overarching theme was the broken state of our culture. People were looking to city and state leaders for answers. As I listened to their concerns, I couldn’t shake the thought that many of the issues plaguing us are of our own making.
Consider this: I’ve been reading a book that mentions the average length of a family dinner today is just 12 minutes—if it happens around a table at all. More often than not, we’re rushing from one event to another, trying to keep our kids involved in activities. While we aim to provide our children with a sense of belonging through these activities, I believe we are missing the point of what we should be doing, rather than what we are doing.
If we could step back in time a hundred years, the average family dinner lasted 90 minutes. Ninety minutes! There were no screens to distract from one another, the meals were prepared together, and time around the table was filled with stories, laughter, lessons, and joy. What could we impart to our children in 90 minutes of daily, uninterrupted family time? I know it sounds like a wild question to ask.
Some might say, “Caleb, there’s no way I could do 90 minutes a day—we’re just too busy.” But that’s precisely where I think we’ve gone astray. The statistics speak for themselves. Consider these stats on adolescents and teens: 60% report experiencing depression, 66% report high anxiety, 75% report feelings of loneliness, and 35% have had suicidal thoughts.
Dr. James Dobson, a renowned psychologist, once said: "One of the best antidepressants is a family meal. There’s something about sitting around the dinner table that can soothe the soul and nourish the spirit. The simple act of gathering, eating together, and sharing conversation creates a bond that can help alleviate feelings of loneliness and depression."
As I sat in that political meeting last night, I kept thinking about the fact that many of the attendees identified as Christians. We, as followers of Christ, hold the answers. We have access to the instruction manual.
"And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise." (Deuteronomy 6:6-7)
This is the true answer. Yet, I sense that many are hesitant to believe it, thinking that it doesn't seem like a solution that could change the culture. But the reality is—it will change the culture.
I understand some may dismiss this as a naive or ineffective idea, believing instead that what we need is political action, or that Congress or the city council must act. We’ve been conditioned to think that political movements are what change the world. However, I contend that if the majority of Christian families simply lived out what they profess to believe, our cities would look very different.
What we truly need are Christian families to act on their beliefs. We need Christian fathers and mothers to reclaim the ground that has been surrendered to the enemy. How do we do this? We stop rushing from one activity to the next, and recognize that what our children need most is not a sports team, but a family. We need to gather our families back around the dinner table and make the most of the time we have with them.
"Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil." (Ephesians 5:15-16)
If we transform our families, we will transform our cities. If we invite our children's friends and families into our homes and disciple them, that is where transformation begins. I know this isn’t an overnight fix—we didn’t arrive at this point overnight. Those who have contributed to the decay of our culture played a long game, and we must do the same. A Christ-centered, intentional family dinner table will have more impact than anything happening in Washington, D.C. or the city council. I'm not entirely against politics; I’m just more in favor of Gospel action. True Gospel action has the power to transform the politics of our city and nation.
Our mission is to advance the Kingdom of King Jesus, and this is how we do it.
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